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#330 – Turbo Hundo Grand Slammo
I know I should have been writing up the stories of the “Michael Craig is Giving it Away” contest. I want to announce the runner-up and his prize and tell you about the contenders and the things I’ve learned about you/us by reading all the entries. But there was a poker game going on and it ended with me winning the Turbo Hundo for the FOURTH TIME.
I started by playing the Fifty-Fifty, busting 3 off the money. It takes so long to make the REAL money in that one that there’s no shame in bubbling, at least in my opinion. I pushed all-in on the button with A-4. The SB pushed all-in with A-T and the BB called with A-K. I started yelling at the computer – I think that may actually work – for a 4 and got one on the flop (Q-J-4) and another 4 on the turn. The only card that could hurt me was one of the three remaining tens, and the river brought one.
I had already started the Midnight Madness and busted out of there after 2 1/2 hours, finishing 194th out of 1,753 and cashing for a total of $15.78.
By this time, I was itching for something other than NLHE so I entered an Omaha Eight or Better FTOPS satellite. 2 of the 20 entrants won the $216 package. I won that, with just a few minutes to spare before the Turbo Hundo.
I’m the Phil Fucking Hellmuth of the Turbo Hundo. I’ve played it at least 50% of the nights it’s run since Full Tilt started it last summer, maybe 120, 130 times, but look at the results (coming into tonight):
*19 cashes
*10 final tables
*3 times heads up
*3 wins.
Out of 242 entries, I picked up the quatro tonight, even waking up my friend Marissa, who wanted 10% of me, to watch the final table. (I called her house 5 times in the middle of the night with updates. By the 4th call, she probably figured it was news of some tragedy. Well, if she’s gonna get 10% of me without a premium, it would have been a tragedy if she hadn’t been there to watch. She was actually a very good sport.)
I got lucky a couple times and won my races. Marissa was kind enough, after these occasions, to tell me, “Now I see what the secret is to winning this.” I think I had more luck in this one than in some of the others, though less than a week ago I finished 4th and busted by getting all my chips in 97% to win – nut flush on the flop v. a single pair. It’s too bad some of the guys I busted tonight had to pay for that one, but I’ve always maintained the luck evens out. I got some of it back tonight.
If you want to know if there’s anything worse than being around me after I’ve been losing, it’s being around me after I’ve been winning. I’ve already made the following demands of Uncle Tilty (after ordering his underlings to rouse him from his slumber to receive them post haste):
*A new avatar;
*Renaming the Turbo Hundo for me;
*An FTOPS Turbo event;
*A Full Tilt Poker Blog Guarantee Turbo event;
*A Turbo Fifty earlier in the evening;
and so on. I’m ready to engage in hard bargaining over these matters, though if they resort to security footage of what I took from the snack closet in the L.A. office of their software company while working on the STRATEGY GUIDE, maybe we can call it even if they wipe the slate clean and don’t fire me or prosecute.
This is what it means to be drunk with success!
ROCK AND ROLL ALL NIGHT AND PARTY EVERY DAY! (That’s only the second lamest thing I yelled in my house in the middle of the night after winning. The lamest? “YAHTZEE!!!!!!!!”)
