FULL TILT POKER BLOG

#882 – Adrift in Vegas, Part II – Will the Real Ted Forrest Please Report to Baggage Claim?

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On Monday afternoon, Ted Forrest sent me a message to meet him at a sushi restaurant a few blocks east of the Strip. I had asked for a meeting to catch up with Ted – the last time we talked, he was in Thailand – and also to ask him for some insight for my “Looking for Ivey” series. He gave me some helpful information but, like all encounters with Forrest, the excitement was in the journey.

On the way to the restaurant, I told Shauna, “Every time I have ever gotten together with Ted Forrest, he has told me at least one incredibly strange story.” On this occasion, he did not disappoint. Ted introduced us to his friend Pui, who splits the year between Vegas and Thailand. They had been back in the United States less than a month. I surmised that since Ted’s return to the US, he had been on at least a dozen flights. Each one involved an adventure more bizarre than the last.

The root of the problem was Ted Forrest’s identification – or lack thereof.

Ted Forrest’s passport was seized by US Customs in Los Angeles upon his return from Thailand. I don’t remember exactly why but the story was so strange and convoluted that I could have missed his explanation or forgotten to ask. There was some reason why the passport was invalid. I think Ted was using a passport that had previously been reported as lost. Then something happened to the replacement. Knowing Ted, he probably lost the replacement around the time he found the invalidated original. Pui said they held Ted in the tank for two hours while sorting this out.

Naturally, having your passport seized would be a gigantic hassle for international flights. You can’t go anywhere in the world without your passport. But few Americans need their passport for domestic flights. We just use our drivers license or equivalent government-issued ID. But Ted was SOL for domestic flights, too – including the LAX-to-Vegas flight that would take him home.

I believe Ted’s drivers license physically disappeared. There is certainly precedent for that. In fall 2004 when I took Ted to visit Mike Matusow in jail, it caused a problem because they required a state-issued ID prior to visiting an inmate. I tell people for laughs that Ted handed over his players card but I think it was actually a health club ID. Ted still visited with Mike that night. He just did it without permission or authorization.

To Ted’s credit, he tried to get a replacement license. He was told he wasn’t allowed even to apply for a Nevada drivers license. Apparently, Ted Forrest is currently the victim of an ongoing identity theft. Somebody claiming to be Ted Forrest applied for a California drivers license, claimed to have held a Nevada drivers license, and surrendered that license (which invalidated the ability of “Ted Forrest” to hold a Nevada drivers license).

“I asked them to show me a picture of Ted Forrest,” the (presumably) real Ted Forrest told us. “I wanted to know if this person was using my photo or some other photo. They told me I would have to go to Carson City to see.” Even though Shauna and I begged, Ted wouldn’t go with us to Carson City to get the answer. Because he hasn’t gone to Carson City without us either, he currently has no drivers license and no passport. This would be a problem for anybody – I noticed that Ted drove to the restaurant where we met – but was an even bigger problem because Ted has been jet-setting around the private-game poker circuit since his return. Every time he gets on an airplane, instead of giving them identification, he gives them a version of this story.

He is not completely empty-handed, however. US Customs in LA gave him a photocopy of his seized passport and told him to use that in the meantime. They told him that if anyone had a problem with him using this photocopy as ID, they should contact US Customs. This person then scribbled the office phone number on the photocopy.

This may have actually made things worse. It sounds like, in several instances, Ted has had trouble using the photocopy as ID and had airline or security personnel refuse to call the number. Ted has then called the number on his cell phone and tried to hand them the phone.

Ted and Pui told us the story of one such trip, but it was so confusing that I think there were references to some other recent trips. At a minimum, this should be a warning to everybody about what happens if you don’t have your travel documents or do anything that sets you apart from the crowd of faceless people that airport security is too busy or too slow-witted to notice.

They were in New York when Ted got invited to play in a private game with some Famous Rich Guys. To play in the game he had to get to Another City in a hurry. Ted and Pui bought tickets for a commercial flight but were unable to board because Ted didn’t have identification. The photocopy didn’t work and they wouldn’t call the Customs number. He was told he would have to take this up with Customs in LA, unless he filed a false report that his passport was stolen. But when he inquired about this they told him he would have to make the report in Los Angeles. They ended up missing the flight.

They learned they could take a private jet to Another City for $6,100. But that airline refused to take $6,100 in cash. Neither Ted nor Pui had credit cards with that high of a balance. At the airport, as well as by phone and traveling through the greater New York area by taxi, they tried and failed to accommodate the private airline in the following ways: they went to Wells Fargo but it turned out not to be Wells Fargo Bank; they tried to open a new bank account; they tried to offer friends cash for their credit cards; they tried to get a money order; they tried to wire the balance. During all this, it was cold and rainy, Pui was feeling ill, and Ted’s cell phone battery ran out.

Somehow, they got the airline to take their $6,100. Then it turned out the airplane was at a different airport. Their cab driver, while on the highway, told them he would need $125 to complete the trip. When Ted refused, the driver threatened to throw them out of the cab on the highway. Forrest considered it a victory that he got the driver to return them to the (original) airport and allowed them to retrieve their bags from the trunk.

While they were telling us this story, we also learned about some other dramas in Ted Forrest’s recent travels:

One time he took the wrong bag from baggage claim and received a phone call from its owner, who had accidently taken his bag. He was on the highway and drove back to the airport and exchanged bags.
He lost his bags twice on a trip to Madrid. As he was leaving Madrid, he found them in a warehouse with thousands of other bags. The bags were put on the plane with him back to the United States and again lost, this time for good.
He was in a rush to get from Atlantic City to the Philadelphia airport when his cab driver pulled off the road and abruptly ran in to the nearby woods. He returned twenty minutes later, apparently having relieved himself. The ride cost $120 and, even though Ted did not consider this to be “good service” he gave the driver $200 and told him to keep the change. “After that driver came out of the woods, I didn’t want to touch anything he touched.”

If anyone else was telling me this story, I would want to know about the Rich Guys Game. Who was playing? Were they good players? How high did they play? How did Ted do? But with Ted Forrest, just getting someplace is such an adventure that it doesn’t matter what happens after he arrives.

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