Posted by Bond18 | Filed under Bond18
Paris France, May 18: I won’t be playing any poker for a couple days and tomorrow I’ll just be in planes and airports, so I thought I’d do another more random post instead of something bland. One detail that definitely deserves reporting though is that Will managed to overcome his illness and make a deep run in the event, only to stay at the club until almost 8AM and bust in 10th place. He seemed to handle it pretty well, but he spent almost all of today sleeping and trying to recover. Anyway, as for this entry, I thought it would be appropriate to write about random European observations.
1. European people hate clocks: Absolutely despise them. In fact, I’m fairly sure clocks as a whole have been banished from Europe, or at least Italy and France. I’ve stayed in numerous hotel rooms and a cruise ship, and none of those rooms had a clock in them. Apparently everyone operates under the logic of “We’ll get there when we get there.” The only room I’ve been in this whole time that I remember having a clock is the cashier at the Aviation club.
2. European people love cigarettes: Ever wonder what they’re so thin and we Americans are a bunch of fatsos? It’s not because our country is overrun with gluttony and our people our too lazy to work out, it’s because we don’t smoke enough. I haven’t seen any gyms or workout facilities in any city so far, but I have seen hundreds upon hundreds of cafes, with people sitting around out front smoking cigarettes and drinking coffee all day. The secret is out European people, I’m telling everyone; smoke up, weight down.
3. French people love porn: Why else would it be free on my hotels TV, sitting there like it’s any other channel (channels if you want to get technical)? And not just straight porn, no I’m talking full on four dudes going at it gay porn that made me hurl the remote at the TV while clawing at my eyes screaming “GOD DAMN YOU FRENCH PEOPLE!!!”
4. French people love their meat bloody: When you go out to dinner in France and order a steak, make sure to ask for it well done if you want it medium. If you want it well done ask them to shoot it into the sun because there’s no grill hot enough in France.
5. Italians love talking with their hands/arms: Italian people having a calm and mild conversation appear to foreigners as if they’re a heated and drunken debate with more arm flinging than your average boxing match.
Spain is next tomorrow. Hopefully I find some massive generalizations to make about them too.
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